There is nothing like a blast of very loud rock music to put one in a good mood. This morning I woke up, watched the news and wondered if I would survive this pandemic and, in fact if the human race would survive. Yes, I do realise that watching the news first thing in the morning is not recommended. But it is a habit that I don’t seem to be able to break. I am and always have been a news junkie.
However after my morning yoga, a dog walk and breakfast I put on some very loud music – thank you Spotify – and while cleaning the kitchen danced around listening to Led Zeppelin Stairway to Heaven and ignoring the confused looks of my pets I sang along loudly. Led, you were just what I needed. I fully recommend this as a pick me up.

As is my wont this survival thing usually crops up just as I am about to fall asleep. And it’s when I start the ‘if I survive game’ and promise myself all sorts of stuff. When we were children my brother and I used to play the ‘if we win the pools game.’ We would spend endless hours deciding on who would get what. First on the list was a maiden aunt who lived in a bedsit with her mother in a run-down tenement flat in Kilburn. We were horrified that the toilet was 3 floors down and had to be shared with the other tenants and the kitchen well a rather grubby gas ring was in the hallway outside the bedsit. Of course, we didn’t do the pools, but mum did and every Friday the pools man would call to pick them up. We never won.
I also play this game with my premium bonds. When the email arrives “congratulations you have won please check your account,” despite knowing that it will just be £25 I always wait a few days so I can have some time to fantasise what I would do if I got a big win. I also play the Lottery – and have done for 10 years and never won anything. I want to stop but it would be sods law that my numbers would come up. It is odd though that I have never ever won anything. That said I know I am one of the fortunate ones and for that I am very thankful. However, a little win would be nice.
So, what did you all do on New Year’s Eve? I was in bed at 9 with a book – a bit extreme I know. Maybe I was making a point.

I did however have a little pang of envy as my close friends gathered in one of their homes to celebrate. Apparently it was a lot of fun. They have stopped inviting me because they know I won’t come which is true, and yes I do feel a bit left out and wonder just how much this will affect the previous closeness of our friendship. Hopefully it won’t. I have questioned whether I am being a tad over cautious as none of them thankfully have got COVID despite being a lot more out and about than me. So, am I the fool here? Have I been semi shielding since last March, for no good reason? As hopefully a vaccine will soon be rolled out I will not now cave in. However, the governments constant U turns over this virus gives me little confidence of the efficacy of dolling out a single vaccine.
Regarding friendships in the age of COVID19 it is almost as if we have to navigate consent with our friends much like the way we used to with sexual relationships. Talking of which sex that is, have you seen the Netflix period drama Bridgerton? Regé-Jean Page plays the lead, drop dead gorgeous and what a body. The sex scenes – really I think I must have missed out somewhere. I binged watched – and went to bed alone feeling a little forlorn. Certainly, a step up from when Aidan Turner went topless in the BBC’s Poldark? Sadly, I think those days are over for me although I am not sure it was ever quite like Bridgerton. Maybe too much information.

Digressed again sorry I was talking about friendships and going to bed early with a book. Interestingly the book I was reading on the recommendation from a friend was The Price of Peace Money, Democracy, and the Life of the economist John Maynard Keynes. Not exactly the most uplifting New Year’s Eve read but a very interesting perspective from a century ago and still very prevalent. After World War 1 he said, “The real danger was from those who rejected international harmony for national glory,” hmmm sound familiar? I despair that we have learnt nothing from past events.

So, I leave you with the vitally important and profound 2021 predictions of Nicolas Aujul, who claims to see the future through visions; The royal family are apparently in for a rocky ride. There is heartbreak for Kim Kardashian and Megan Markle will reveal all. Riveting news. If only my Granny Roth and her phrenology was still here.
“Let’s be careful out there”