Big big frustration I have just lost the Blog I have been writing for the past 2 hours. I pressed a button and the bloody thing vanished. It is like being back at the beginning of my computer days when I had my first Amstrad and I was working as a freelance journalist. The number of frantic help calls to Tod as I lost yet another vital piece of writing. And I thought I was over all that. Well Tod isn’t here – in fact nobody is here and I am going to have to write the sodding thing again. Yes I know I have time but do I have the inclination. Not really. But here goes.
The morning started badly. I got locked in and I am not speaking metaphorically. The front door was jammed. Not that I am going anywhere but hey one does need to know that one can get out. What if there was a fire? or I had to escape from burglars? or just wave to neighbours. So, what to do? Face time with Toby my youngest son because he has the most patience. And when dealing with technology I need patience.
So, the conversation went a bit like this.
Toby: “I can’t see the lock; Mum I am just seeing your face. Switch the camera around.”
Me: “How do I do that.”
Toby: “The little button with a video camera at the bottom of the phone.”
Me: (Only had this phone for 10 years!) Ok yes, I see it. Here we go.
Toby: “Up a bit mum can’t see the lock. No to the left, to the left. TO THE LEFT. Mum you are going to the right. Step back a bit you are too close, no that’s too far back. Aim the phone inside the lock. No not at the ceiling. Mum you have gone off camera I can’t see the lock.”
And I thought that trying to take the picture of the inside of mouth for the dentist was difficult. This has been a trying few days for me and my iPhone.
So, it went on. 30 minutes later, sweating profusely and with the aid of a credit card I managed to release the jammed lock. I was upset, the dog was upset, the neighbour opposite was wondering why I kept walking up to the front door and then disappearing and reappearing. Izzi barked throughout. Now, not only am I exhausted but I also have a headache. And it’s only 9.30 in the morning.
Today — although I am fast losing the will to carry on – I was going to write about time because I don’t get why I never seem to have enough time in the day to get stuff done. And it is just stuff. My world has shrunk beyond anything I would have imagined and yet, far from being bored I haven’t managed to accomplish many of my desired tasks on my ‘to do’ list. The best bit of lists is the crossing off or the ticks and my list doesn’t have any. Everything seems to take at least 3 times longer than before. How is this possible. This is what I did yesterday.
5.30 am Oh God is it really so early. Please let me go back to sleep. Why can’t I sleep till 9 like in the old days. Oh how I loved the old days. 6.00 am No clearly not going back to sleep. Don’t reach for phone. You know if you start so early you will get sucked into social media and before you realise it you have lost 2 hours. First cup of coffee on my balcony. Feed the animals and dog walk – at least I beat the joggers. 7 am back to bed with second cup of coffee and my best friend – my IPad. Goodness knows what will happen is she stops working. Then I really will have to slit my throat!
Note to self: Do not watch News. Remember how you felt when you saw the BBC Horizon Programme – it took you 2 hours to recover from the comments; “this disease is now out of control.”
Wash, clean up the kitchen, (those bloody little elves have been at it again!) Yoga session, baked a lemon drizzle cake for eldest son, played bridge, walked to post box with birthday cards for middle son. And that was about it but by 9 pm I was exhausted and fell into bed hardly the energy to read my Kindle. So, thoughts please?
I googled Einstein’s theory of relativity to get some insight into this time thing but being an impatient sod, and having very little focus at the moment, I couldn’t get through it all. Basically, he talks about how the faster we go, the more the time is affected. But if I go much slower time will have stopped altogether. And it hasn’t. Maybe I need to read it all again.
I think that as the world around us has lost its schedule so I have also lost mine. Going forward and I have no option but to go forward, I believe that putting a daily schedule in place, and keeping to it, is what will help stop me going a little insane. The broadcaster and journalist Joan Bakewell said recently that daily schedules are vital to one’s sanity. She even schedules reading time.
Just for the record the sun has almost set and I have not done any Pilates or Yoga or my mediation. I can see that I need that schedule more than ever.
Let’s be careful out there”